The beginning of a love requires heartbeat; the growth of a love needs to overcome many difficulties. A long-distance relationship is enough to equal the growth you have gained from ten relationships with different people nearby.
I want to say that one long-distance relationship is enough to equal the growth you have gained from ten relationships with different people right in front of you. Not to mention alien love.
1.Strong enough heart
First of all, if you are a long-distance relationship patient, or you are about to start a long-distance relationship, then you need to make sure that you have a strong heart. The strengths here include: trust, inclusion, and understanding. The reasons for the failure of long-distance relationships are partly because of loneliness, emptiness and coldness, and the other party’s disloyalty (but in fact, it is very rare, unless you meet someone who is very unreliable), and most of it is because of jealousy, jealousy, cranky thinking, caused by distrust of the other party.
There are only men and women in this world, and it is impossible for your lover to only get along with the same sex. In fact, one of the rare benefits of a long-distance relationship is the freedom to hang out with your friends. But what you need to do is to let the other person know.
Even if the other party goes out to play with someone of the opposite sex that you don’t know, you can rest assured. Believe me, doing this in the long run will be very beneficial to your relationship and will gain more trust. These trusts can eliminate any major suspicions and conflicts. envy. For example, when I just graduated from college, the dormitory was emptied, but I had to do something and couldn’t leave, and it was a headache and troublesome, so I moved to a good friend of the opposite sex of mine. Of course, I told my boyfriend in advance, and after he agreed, I went. My boyfriend trusts me enough even in a bachelor apartment with only one room and one bed.
My friend of the opposite sex is a very reliable person. He made the floor, I slept in bed, and stayed together for a week. I believe that this is not something everyone can do. Many people may not want to see their lover talking to the opposite sex. To be honest, this is not good. When I go out to travel, sometimes in order to save money, I will open a standard room with friends of the opposite sex. There has never been any so-called “deviance”. Instead, I can chat seriously, and even talk about history, politics and economy. These things are never over. I believe there are still serious people in the majority of the population in this world.
2.Don't deliberately distort the meaning of the other party
Today’s technology is so advanced, the ways to contact each other are more and more diversified. However, text messages and even phone conversations, as long as they are not face-to-face conversations, can lead to semantic misunderstandings.
Once, my boyfriend said that he either likes being alone, or hangs out with a lot of people, and doesn’t like two or three people. In fact, this is nothing, the starting point is to express a certain social way that I like, but at that time I became angry all of a sudden, and deliberately interpreted it as “I like to be alone but not two or three people together”, which means that you don’t like to be with you either. When the two of me stayed together, I would get mad, so angry that I burst into tears, and I would turn over all kinds of accounts, thinking how could you treat me like this once before, and how did you say that kind of thing once before.
The other party couldn’t figure it out, and expressed his incomprehension to me. In fact, after two people have been together for a long time, there will always be such problems. The more they care about each other, the more sensitive they are. Even if my father and my mother have been married for decades, sometimes they will be deliberately proud. Therefore, before misunderstanding, the first thing to do is to calmly and patiently ask clearly. Mutual understanding, mutual tolerance, and thinking from the starting point of the words, not the content, will bring peace of mind, and reason will crush quarrels in the budding stage.
3.Let it go is not the best explanation
No one can really tell what will happen in the future. There are always people who are worried about this and that, and we can only say “go with the flow”. In the past, I always felt that we should really “follow the destiny and do our best”, but now I realize that if a person only focuses on “following the destiny”, he will become lazy, lose enthusiasm for life, and even not interested in anything. .
My boyfriend and I are in a long-distance relationship in China. We are separated by more than 1,700 kilometers, and we don’t see each other several times a year. Now he has flown to the US and I am about to fly to the UK. We are both going to study and have to be separated temporarily. Many people don’t understand and always ask me what to do with you two in the future. I used to like to say, let it be. But I have even made a plan for the next five years. After I graduate, I will go back to China, whether to go to the south or the north, stay in the UK or fly to the United States. I have thought about all kinds of plans. Comrade Xiaoping didn’t say, “It’s hard to grasp both hands. “?
In fact, career and relationship are equally important and should be considered together. Therefore, you’d better not always use “go with the flow” to prevaricate, and make sure the other party feels that no matter what difficult situation you are in, you are working hard for your love. No matter how bad today is, at least plan for tomorrow, it can make tonight more practical, right?
4.Don't force the other party to do things you don't want to do
When many people fall in love, they have to keep up with each other in whatever trivial things they like, such as music taste, movie type, etc., but this will bring a burden to the other party. For example, my boyfriend prefers Hollywood commercial blockbusters or mindless funny American dramas, but I don’t like them. I like spoof movies made by small finished products, or British dramas or documentaries with depressing pictures (this may be related to my professional journalism department) .
Once, my boyfriend took me to see Mission: Impossible 4, and I slept in the movie theater. Later, every time I watched a movie, whether I went to the cinema or at home, he would ask me what I wanted to watch, and only after finding something in common (both preferred funny movies) would we watch it together. If you want to see Sheldon, you can laugh when you are alone, and if I want to see medieval English society, I am alone.
This is the best way to not deliberately change anything for the other party, and to do what you like to do. Some people may ignore each other’s feelings and feel that the other party loves them only by doing what the other party does. This is not good, and both parties will hold grudges. Don’t force the other party to love you in your own way. This is very bad for your relationship. it is good. My boyfriend is the type who doesn’t like to be nice, but I won’t force him to say this to me every day.
Although talking nicely can enhance each other’s feelings, but if the other party doesn’t like to talk, let it be. Maybe he suddenly rises up and says something nice to you, and you can be moved even more deeply.
5.Speak your own thoughts: for most boys
To be honest, as a girl, I can’t do this well either. Maybe I belong to the person who loves to hide everything in my heart, but I’m also trying my best to do it. Girls are naturally more delicate than boys. If you are unhappy, girls may feel it at the first time. No matter how much you don’t want to say it, if you don’t explain, girls will think that she is annoying you. No matter how independent a girl is, she will be suspicious and worried about whether you want to break up with her (I said that I was also shot). It is better for you to tell her directly that she was abused in the afternoon basketball game, which is very uncomfortable.
6.You have to make yourself better
People who are in a long-distance relationship sometimes see couples on the street and they are alone, and they feel a little lost. If they are lost more, they will blame their lover, but don’t forget, your lover is also going through the same thing as you. You may be worried, worried about the enemy killed halfway, worry about time and space, in fact, nothing happened at all, so don’t imagine it. This will make your emotions very negative, and when you listen to lost love songs, you will feel like the world is falling apart. Don’t be envious, jealous and hate those little couples who stick together every day. We don’t have the time or energy to even cross the jet lag to get angry, quarrel, lose our temper and break up.
All you have to do is wrap your coat tightly when the wind blows, study hard and work hard, participate in various activities, write reports and give speeches, go to bed early and get up early. What we have to do is one day in the future, to be qualified to stand together with the most unquestionable attitude.
My feeling: You have a person who can stick with you, a heart with the same persistence and dreams as yourself, and a love that is strong enough to challenge distance. In fact, you are happier than anyone else.