Many studies have shown that most people who like SM have higher IQs. The reason is very simple, SM is a game that strongly requires imagination and fantasy desire. People who like SM have a high talent for acting. The happiest moment of a person is not the moment when their desire is realized, but the moment when they wait for their desire to be realized. This is the best part of SM. From the beginning to the end, the tonality is not the sex. That is to say, SM pays more attention to the process than any kind of game.
A smart S can turn the waiting into thrilling, full of tricks, and appetizing. The real S is creative. S is both the screenwriter of SM’s life and the director of the whole process. S wants to guide M into the role, constantly. Push the S to unimaginable heights. S will not be rigid, S will not be the same, S will make M completely unpredictable, S will make M tremble in fear and desperate for the exciting experience to come, S will control and play as he wants In pursuit of M’s desire, the pleasure is infinitely magnified, and M is deeply trapped in it. The real S has keen insight and always pays attention to how M feels. S will discover the essence of M, and gradually train M to achieve the goal in appropriate ways and means, without letting M suffer unnecessary physical and mental harm. In fact, in the SM relationship, M is the experiencer of happiness, and S is the concrete implementer who helps M realize his desires and fantasies.
Everyone is a unique individual, if you don’t know the other, how do you know what she needs? What exactly is missing? You must know that M participates in SM in the hope of obtaining something that cannot be obtained in reality from this game. S’s temperament is not reflected in the appearance of strong, rude language and domineering behavior. On the contrary, S may be a gentle and calm person .
A real S will have a lot of social experience, the quality of S, the experience of S, this quality plus experience, the ability of S to control the abuse process, so the real S has a strong sense of responsibility, only in this way can S be able to. Obtain M’s complete trust, obedience and entrustment. S must have enough self-control to control himself and then control the whole situation, because in the real SM relationship, M is completely owned by S, who would not love what belongs to him?
The real SM is firstly based on mutual understanding. By understanding, I mean the “taste” of the abused M, a real S. Understanding should be a very important premise and foundation for the abuse process. S’s experience and abuse training are very important and critical. Don’t let the other party know about your own. It’s really ridiculous to “teach” the other party according to your own abuse as soon as you get in touch! Trust is the key. Under the premise of understanding the abuse preferences of both parties, if the two parties can agree (at least basically agree) in terms of giving and receiving, then it is possible for S and M to combine. The foundation of trust is mutual understanding, and this process requires sincerity to maintain.
The real S must understand M’s mentality, behavior, actions, and M’s bottom line. The conquest of the soul is the real conquest, and the spiritual surrender is the real surrender. I think in SM, “sincerity” is the most important thing. The premise is that in the vast sea of people, people are easily lost and easily troubled by various setbacks. SM can release the pressure at work. Sadomasochism is an activity that obtains pleasure through pain and gap. There is no huge gap. There is no shocking pleasure, to experience the true happiness of SM, trust is the first condition. Trust between master and slave is essential. Only when M completely trusts the other party and delivers himself to the other party without reservation, can M let go of all psychological burdens and guards like a real pet. Because the master will protect you well. Only based on trust can real obedience and attachment be produced, and it can also directly point to the heart and soul of people, so as to get the real release of inner desire and pressure. The conquest of S over M must be both physical and spiritual. Do you need this feeling, do you need spiritual support, SM is a desire that everyone has buried in their hearts, it’s just a game that entertains both parties.
It is difficult to surpass yourself in SM. This kind of transcendence is a process. In the process of continuous transcendence, one discovers and perfects oneself, and finally achieves maturity in the true sense.
SM is an exciting game. It should be equal and respect each other, so that both parties can get psychological pleasure. The quality of S is the key to building trust. The premise of this quality is experience, and the key is the ability of S to control the abuse process. An excellent S is always extremely calm during training. The premise is experience. The pursuit of SM is the thrill of spirit and flesh, and its purpose is “safety” First”. The “safety” mentioned here means that no reputational damage or bodily harm can be brought about.