In addition to what we know about female masturbation, we also surveyed fans’ attitudes toward female masturbation. The results showed that male respondents felt more positive about female masturbation, while female respondents felt bittersweet.
Nearly half of women feel that masturbation is not good or has bad elements, and the biggest reason is shame, embarrassment and embarrassment about female masturbation (49.3%). Sexual stigma is deeply internalized among women, making women feel withdrawn when it comes to pleasing themselves.
Through conversations with several fans, we have further learned about people’s likes and dislikes about masturbation, which mainly stem from the following aspects: a. Dislike of masturbation may be due to dissatisfaction with themselves Some people do not like female masturbation because of It fuels their dissatisfaction with themselves.
For some men, for example, seeing a female partner masturbate can spark anxiety about their masculinity. Some men even ask their female partners not to masturbate to protect their self-esteem.
I used to worry that I was useless. If I was the best, what would she do with those toys? To put it horribly, a man’s lower head is related to the upper face, and seeing her like this makes me shy… Later, she persuaded me to look at this issue from a cooperative perspective rather than a competitive mentality, which I think is correct. She’s that great, and I use it to massage my shoulders now, and it’s very comfortable.
…Actually, it’s not a competition. Her words that time made me stunned. She said: Really, people can be hard on it 24 hours a day, can you? Hi!
– Michale, male, 28
While some women feel that masturbation damages their sense of self-worth, they internalize negative comments about female desires that they experienced growing up and heard.
When they masturbated, they couldn’t help labeling themselves “dirty” and “disorderly”. Also, some women have negative memories of masturbation, and these memories, along with self-blame, affect their experience of masturbation.
When I was 10, my mom woke up in the middle of the night to see if I slept. She kept walking quietly, I didn’t notice. Seeing the movements of my hands, she rushed over and beat me in the face, saying that my hands were ‘soaked in a pile of dead fish’, and then grabbed my hands and rubbed them with soap for an unknown amount of time…
I haven’t masturbated since that day, more than 20 years later, and I still remember her face that night.
—Jelly, female, 33
People who like “female masturbation” feel it brings pleasure and freedom Not all people are disgusted with their female partner masturbating, on the contrary, some people feel relieved that their partner will masturbate and they don’t have to force themselves to have sex “Superman”.
I will be tired too. Knowing that she can take care of herself when I’m not feeling well, I feel so much more relaxed. Now if one of us wants it and the other is not, then the one who wants it goes to masturbate, it’s no big deal. Sometimes I was too tired to work overtime, so I would just lie next to her and watch her masturbate. She looked so beautiful then.
Sex shouldn’t just be an expression of desire, but also intimacy and communication, and lying next to her like this made me feel close and content.
——David, male, 29
There are also women who enjoy masturbation because it allows them to please themselves better and experience pleasure on their own terms.
I’ve read a piece of advice before that women should experience masturbation before having sex with someone else for the first time, so that they don’t feel unfamiliar with sexual encounters. From personal experience, I think it’s true. The first time I had sex with my boyfriend I wasn’t nervous because I knew what it was like and what it felt like to touch my private parts, and I was in control of my body.
—Anonymous, female, 20
During the survey, we were also asked: “If I’ve never masturbated/don’t want to masturbate, is there something wrong with me?”
In fact, I am not writing this article today to persuade everyone to try masturbation, or to regard it as some kind of “universal antidote”. We just want to clear some obstacles, and when you want to try and there is a path to pleasure, we hope that you will not be afraid to step on it because of the judgment imposed by others or yourself.
Born as a woman, you should have the same choice as a man in sex. No matter what the mainstream voices say, may you still hold this freedom in your hands.